Well hello, December. i never thought I’d see you again this soon.
This time around last year, I was bummed by your arrival because you signify the end of my prolonged summer escape. Yet this year, I welcome your arrival with an open arms. Meeting you means I’ve not only succeeded in that one month blog posting challenge, but also survived November’s turmoil. Because this year’s November was honestly a roller coaster ride like no other. But I’m not going to delve deeper there, for it’s a battle scar that I’d be glad not to relieve anytime soon.
In a way, though, it had quite a positive effect. The emotional and mental strains were too much to be repressed and I was forced to finally get back in touch with my feelings, opening my gate and allowing them to pour out in strings of words and heartfelt sentences. I started to write, again.
And I suppose I should thank you for that, right?
You were the one that prompted me to write again, and you provoked what would then became a month of turbulence, filled with breathtaking ups and crushing downs and scarce in betweens. Not to mention inducing a new unhealthy habit that would most likely be hard to shake off.
But you also spurred me to take part in #NaBloPoMo and somewhere along the way, you weren’t my sole muse anymore. You also gave me comfort and provided those safe and sound feeling I’ve been missing. And you made me felt alive again. You reminded me how satisfying it is to take chances and fell head first, how the reeling pain is worth the high.
It was also thanks to you, that I got down from my fictional cloud and stepped back on reality. Mended strained relationships and strengthen the new ones. And thanks to you I found that I got support systems in all the right places, even when I’m at my lowest. And that there are people who would not mind me even when I took off my pretenses.
You weren’t just black or white, for in the course of last month you became a right blend of both.
So I found it apt that, after starting #NaBloPoMo with a post for you, I ended it with another post for you, written way back when our collision started but was kept in secret until the time is right.
Until last month ended with me finding my closure from you and the two us has settled into a nice rhythm of being each other’s friend and support system.
À la mort,
So long, and thanks for being more than just a relapse.